I’ve been irregular lately, as defined by the dictionary:

1.  Not even or balanced; twisted.

For example, when I get on the scale and it rewards me with a satisfactory number, I don’t pay any attention to what my husband John eats.  BUT if the scale insults me with a number higher than I think I deserve, or I discover a skirt I wore last month is too tight, I start obsessing about everything that guy puts in his mouth. He could eat a bacon cheese burger with extra fries every night of the week with nary a word from me, but suddenly, because MY buttonholes on MY shirt won’t keep their little mouths shut, I become the authority on what John should or should not eat.  This pattern went unnoticed by me until a voice, in lawyer-speak said,

“Isn’t if a fact, Mrs. Cowan, that on the evening your husband was eating an Almond Joy, YOU were wanting his candy bar, and though HIS pants still fit HIM, YOUR skinny jeans were everything BUTT, and in a fit of insecurity, denial and covetousness, you took your verbal mallet and hit him over the head about HIS eating habits?!?”

“YES!  YES- it’s TRUE!”  I cried, laying my head on the podium and sobbing (drama is my other coping mechanism).

The Moral of the Story:  My sins always look so detestable on someone else.

Thankfully, these irregular patterns of mine are always set straight by the Word of God.

Liars hate their victims.  Pro. 26:28

You’ve been weighed on the scales and have been found wanting.  Daniel 5:27

Peter said, “Lord what about this man?”  Jesus said to him, “…What is that to you?  You follow Me!”  John 21:21, 22

If you continue in My word…you will know the truth and the truth shall set you free.  John 8:32

You were called to be free.  But do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh; rather serve one another humbly in love.  Gal. 5:13

P.S.  Dear John, Here- eat my candy bar.

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